Forgiveness...

Two weeks ago, our character trait was Forgiveness. The definition for it was "Clearing the record of those who have wronged me and not holding a grudge." It's so easy to want forgiveness. Maybe there was a time you lashed out at someone for something they didn't even do. It's times like that when we want forgiveness. Sometimes when the table is turned forgiveness doesn't seem like the answer. It's a complete different story when we are the ones who need to forgive. If we feel like we have a reason to be mad at someone or upset with someone, we take advantage of it. There might even be times when we have a legitimate reason to be upset with someone. However, that's not an excuse for us to get so mad that we never forgive them for whatever might have happened. Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. There's times we do things and don't deserve forgiveness. So when those times come and we don't want to forgive others, we need to remind ourselves that we don't always deserve forgiveness either. Jesus Christ is the ultimate example of a forgiving person. He died on the cross to pay for our sins. Did we deserve that? Absolutely not. He did it anyway. There's nothing anyone could ever do to us that's worse than what Christ went through for us. If you ever get so mad or upset that you feel you can't forgive, just think about Jesus and everything He has forgiven you for. In the teen girls class, one of our lessons had to do with things people have done to us that have upset us. The girls listed off several different things such as spreading rumors, saying hurtful things, lying to me, etc. We talked about how sometimes we "forgive" someone for something, but then if we aren't careful we bring it back up and then let it turn into bitterness. 

Micah 7:19 says "He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea." 

If the Lord can forgive us and cast our sins into the depths of the sea, we should be able to do the same thing with others. Whether we feel like they deserve our forgiveness or not. We did a little activity in our class and drew a picture of things we should "cast into the depths of the sea." We also put a sign in there that said "No Fishing." Once you forgive someone for something, cast it into the sea and leave it there. Don't look for reasons to "go fishing" and bring it back up again. Jesus doesn't throw our sin back in our face. Forgive and move on!

Don't judge my picture, I'm not an artist! lol

So, there's this guy...

I'm pretty sure I only have like 1 person who even reads these (thanks Karen), but I thought it might be fun to tell you about my boyfriend. If I remember correctly, I was 15 or 16 when we first met, so we've "known" of each other for about 7 years. Our youth choir sang at a church where his dad used to Pastor in Louisiana. To be completely honest (and he already knows this), I do not remember meeting him then. He also remembers seeing me several different times after that at different revivals and also a few times at my church. I don't remember any of those times either. I'm terrible, I know! Fast forward a few years to June/July (I can't remember which month) 2012. We went to the same week of youth camp at Triple S. One night that week, my Uncle J.D. kept trying to get me to go introduce myself to "some guy" named Aaron Grabanski. The name sounded familiar but I couldn't remember why. Little by little things began to click and I remembered that we sang at a church he attended in Louisiana. My Uncle J.D. told me that he had prayed with Aaron and that he was talking about going to the same Bible College as me. That didn't make a difference to me. I can be very shy (as well as stubborn) at times, and this was one of those times. I refused to go introduce myself to him. A week or so went on and I couldn't stop thinking about this guy that I didn't even "know". I began to pray for him every day. Not praying that I could marry him or anything like that, just praying for him in general. Once I went to college in August I expected him to show up too, but he ended up not coming. I continued to pray for him over the next two years. I remember seeing him once each year at a camp meeting in Eufaula, Oklahoma. I didn't talk to him either time (mainly because I'm a big chicken). As each day went on, I felt like this guy was one of my best friends and I couldn't even remember ever having an actual conversation with him. At the beginning of 2014, I, being the creeper that I am, followed him on Twitter and Instagram. Once I worked up the courage, I would occasionally "like" a picture here and there or retweet one of his tweets, hoping he would talk to me. Finally, on May 8th I received a message on twitter. I don't even remember what it said, but I was ridiculously excited. I didn't want him to know that though, so I waited a few hours before replying to it. He ended up calling my Uncle J.D. and getting permission to ask me for my number. During one of our conversations I found out he was finally coming to college. Again, I was super excited because that meant I would see him in 3 months. 

In July I went to a Ladies Spectacular that Aaron's mom was speaking at. In her class she passed around a basket with little candy bars in it. Each one had either a word or a bible verse on it. the one I got had the word Patience on it.

 

I didn't realize how much I would need that. I guess if I'm honest, I have to admit I am not the most patient person. If there's something I want, I go after it. One thing I've learned over the years is that timing is everything. A quote I would (and still) repeat to myself was "The right person at the wrong time is the wrong thing." Once I stopped trying to control things, they started falling together just how God wanted them! Even though it might just seem like a huge coincidence, I think the reason behind me getting the one that said patience was a reminder from God to take things slow. 

August came along and I was kind of afraid that the first time we talked in person might be awkward, but it wasn't at all. I felt like we had known each other my entire life. He is a big goofball and I absolutely love it. He constantly has me laughing.

  

He's a little social butterfly and doesn't meet a stranger.We are complete opposites in that area. He's slowly bringing me out of my shell. We spent the next two semesters getting to know each other. (We are still and always will be getting to know each other better.) We'd prayed a lot about it and talked to our authorities and both had peace about taking a step in our relationship. So, on May 3rd 2015, we started courting. I'm excited to see what the Lord has in store for our future. 

Blogging Take Two ;-)

As fun as blogging seems, I just can't get into it! I love reading other peoples blogs. I guess that is because I'm nosey. But seriously, there have been so many blogs that I've read over the years that turned out to be a huge encouragement to me. I guess my ultimate goal is to hopefully some day have one of "those posts" that helps someone. Helps someone to see that they aren't the only one with problems. It's so easy to get down and if we aren't careful we start letting the devil convince us that we have terrible lives and there's not even a point in trying anymore. This time of year always convicts me. I teach the teen girls class in a program called Character First!

Let me just pause for a second and say how thankful I am for the family the Lord has blessed me with. These girls deal with things much harder than anything I've ever had to go through. For only being 13-17, they've been through a lot! I don't know what it's like to grow up in the home of an alcoholic or drug dealer. I don't know what it's like to have to raise my younger siblings because my parent(s) stay out all night partying.  That's how it is for a lot of our bus kids and kids that attend character first. Uncle JD says "They'll get into your heart or they'll get under your skin." That's the absolute truth. A lot of them have bad attitudes. They can seem extremely annoying and completely disrespectful at times. But before being critical of them and letting them get "under my skin" I always make myself stop and think. The truth is, I would act the exact same way if I was being treated the way they get treated. If I had to live the lives they live. They just need to know someone cares. They need to know someone loves them. That's why we are here. We are here to share the love of Christ with others.

Busy!

Well I started this little blogging thing thinking it was gonna be something fun to do in my free time! Little did I know that things were going to get so busy the closer Graduation got! It's all over now though! I have officially Graduated High School!!!

Now I'm working at our church's summer program every day, Character First! I help my aunt Lydia out with Teenage Girls! I take for granted how blessed I really am!. It is so crazy how excited they get over the smallest things! Little things like making bracelets or spraying their hair with that washable spray paint stuff! These are things that I used to do all the time as a kid, and some of them have never EVER done it before! I'm supposed to be the one teaching them to be grateful..when really they are probably teaching me more than i'm teaching them! I'm going to miss them when the summer ends!

The next step after this for me will be Bible College! I am having all these mixed emotions! I am so very excited about it, but its sinking in that I am going to be 7 hours from my friends and family and that is a scary thought! Oh and the fact that I will turn 19 while I am there..I have NEVER been alone on my birthday! Well I mean I obviously won't be alone, considering the fact that there will be about 500 other students there! But I mean alone, without any of my friends or family! I know, I know...I have to grow up sometime...I JUST DONT WANT TO!! I am almost ready though, really! I have been preparing myself for college for over a year now. I was ready last year, when I was going to graduate a year early. I'm so glad I waited though, I wasnt ready then! Now its all falling together just like it should! God is So Good!

Trusting God!

My Aunt Dee was diagnosed with breast cancer not too long ago! They are thinking its Stage 1 but they will not find out for sure until they see it! She goes in the morning at 7 to have surgery so please keep her in your prayers that the surgery will go good and that she will recover quickly!! and also that the cancer is just in the one spot and that they are able to remove it all!
Im getting so excited. Graduation is only 93 days away! Im excited to see what God has in store for me!! I'm so thankful for all my friends and family! This year started out kinda rough and its because of them, their prayers, and their support that I was able to finally understand that even though things seemed so unfair and so messed up that as long as I would stay faithful to God and serve Him no matter what He would work it all out in HIS time! I have huge issues with patience! I do not have any patience whatsoever! When I want something done, I like it to be done...RIGHT THEN! And a lot of times I will try to do it all in my own strength and it always ends up getting worse, When all along if I would have just waited for God to fix it then it would have worked out even more perfect then I could have ever imagined!

I guess I said all that to say that now its another one of those hard times and instead of being so upset, stressed, and/or worried we just need to trust God! He wont take you through something that you cant handle! and Aunt Dee is a very strong person! I know that in the end it will all work out however God wants and that will always be best! It is still scary though, so just please remember to pray for her!!

Volleyball!

When we first moved to Arkansas about 4 years ago I had a HORRIBLE attitude! I was not happy! I did not wanna leave Texas! But it wasnt like I just had a horrible attitude cause we had to move! I just had a bad attitude in general! Every little thing would make me lose my temper! Well when I started playing volleyball I really used to lose it! I would get so mad when I would make a bad pass, mess up on a spike, or miss a serve! I crack up now when I think about it cause I would seriously act like a little two year old! I would get mad and stomp my foot or slap my leg! I dont even know what I was thinking! Anyways, my uncle JD started working with me on it! We would have little talks every once in a while and he would tell me not only did it make me look bad but that it was also reflecting on him as a coach! It got to the point where if I didnt make some fast changes I would end up being the Benchwarmer and I definitely didnt want that!! It took some time, but after awhile I finally got my temper under control and learned how to stay calm and just shake it off rather then throwing a temper tantrum and then getting subbed out! So now it has always been a little joke between me and Uncle JD! Before every game he would always say "No playing patty-cake on your knees during this game" And for the most part I did pretty good keeping a good attitude! Uncle JD always said there is no reason to lose your temper over something like that, you are not going to die for making one little mistake! He would also say There is Life after volleyball! That is kinda where I am at now! I just played my last state tournament and now it is time to quit worrying about volleyball and focus on the things in life that actually matter!! I will always be thankful that Uncle JD took the time to work with me and help me get rid of my bad attitude!

Just Me!

Well first of all I want to start off saying that I Love Jesus! It blows my mind that He would die on a cross just for me! I got saved on March 17, 2007 on the way back to El Dorado from a Camp Meeting in Tennessee at Bro.Tony Hutson's church! I love my Family so much! I am very thankful that I have parents that raised me in Church and have taught me the difference between right and wrong! I am also thankful for all the rest of my family! They are always supportive of my decisions and I know I wouldnt be who I am without them! Both of my parents Dad's were/are Preachers. I consider it an honor to be a Preachers Grand Kid! I never got to meet my Dad's dad, but I am happy that one day I will meet him in Heaven! My mom's dad, Papaw, is 75 and still going strong for the Lord! That is a huge motivation for me! If he is 75 and doing all that He is doing right now for the Lord then there is no reason that I shouldnt be able to do that and more! ~1st Samuel 12:24, Only fear the LORD, and serve Him in truth with all your heart: for consider how great things He hath done for you!~ The Lord had been so good to me.
Soon I'll be graduating and going off to Bible College . That is my reason for starting this, so everyone can stay up to date on how my life is going now and then keep up with me after I'm gone!